12 Down, 12 Up

My right knee is 'in flare', that is, very painful (rather than just the 'normal' background ache), not reliable in bearing my weight, which in turn affects my balance, stiffer than usual with a reduced ability to bend and painful to straighten fully, feeling like the knee is on sideways and contains a ball of over-tightened rubber bands which break and twang painfully, and generally the cause of much swearing! It wakes me during the night, and between coping with it and not sleeping so well, I feel so tired and lacking in energy.

It's been like this on and off this year and then consistently since mid-August, when I twisted it attempting to stop a shopping trolley with a mind of its own in a blustery wind from wandering off to play with other cars and pedestrians.

I refuse to go back onto oral pain relief, relying instead on the various methods of pain relief I'd found, but even they are sometimes not enough. I looked for information on rest and arthritis and concluded that although 'sit down before you have to' is good advice, the other advice to get 'proper rest' needed a little more exploration. I was also reading about time-restricted eating - restricting meals to a 12 hour or possibly 8 hour window in the day, so I thought I would combine rest and time-restricted eating and see how that went.

The result was reasonably successful. During my 12 hours 'down' horizontal rest, I could do all my horizontal physio exercises, some yoga and mindfulness exercises, check some email and other messages and get some decent sleep and rest to counter nights disturbed by pain.

During my 12 hours 'up', I tried to get everything else done and feed myself.

I've been on this 12 Down, 12 Up for the past six weeks or so. Now, it's time to stop. My knee is better than it was, though still painful. The time-restricted eating has supported my gradual, imperceptibly slow weight loss. I feel well rested. But, I can't do as much as I need to in only 12 hours, things have slipped due to lack of attention and I'm starting to feel like I'm just being lazy (a sign, if any were needed, that my energy levels are back up!)

I didn't discuss it beforehand, knowing that many people who don't live with chronic pain and the resulting fatigue would not understand, nor be sympathetic. Even so, I found it difficult to give myself permission to do this, but I'm glad I did. It's joined my arsenal of potential techniques to manage and live with severe osteoarthritis.

Dribs and drabs

It seems I have some creative mojo again, or it might just be that the miserable weather and need to rest my knee means I'm sitting knitting a bit more. This set includes a jumper and a pair of socks which have been languishing by the side of the sofa since spring.

I've also had a go at another prototype knitted swirly tree. It's still not quite there yet, I need to correct some things.

I have a bit of a stash of batteries, from the time that I used a CD player for class, torches in the country dark on a regular basis, and various other things. Trouble is, they needed to be sorted into dead ones to be recycled (new recycling scheme here next month is going to take these in the kerbside recycling, hurrah!), recharged, needing to be charged and good to use. So I reused some plastic take out containers, labelled them (colour coded, even!) and, more by good luck than good planning, they fit neatly side-by-side across the drawer I currently use for batteries and other associated bits.

I've also had a couple of sessions recycling a few more old socks and knickers into jersey yarn.

It doesn't count, but I've also learned how to make a collage in GIMP. I got a bit fed up of tweaking things so it's not perfect, but good enough.

Clockwise from top left: swirly tree, jumper, jersey yarn, battery pots, socks

I'm going to need to crack on and create some more stock for a winter craft market - providing I get a table.

This batch of things: 6
Cumulative total: 34

My Cup of Tea socks

I saw this pattern on Ravelry and thought it would be a nice one to allow me to keep my hand in with a heel-flap-and-gusset heel, and a decorative pattern which confined itself to a neat panel down the front.

I used Drops Fabel Sand long print, even though the pattern wouldn't show to best effect with the stripes, I think it turned out well.

The first thing I needed to do was adapt the pattern to my usual 72 stitch cast on, on 2.75 mm dpns. I  also decided to work in my usual way, with the sole/heel stitches all on one needle and the instep stitches divided evenly over two needles. I start by knitting the sole stitches and don't 'number' my needles (effectively working clockwise rounds), so I was rather flummoxed by the redistribution of stitches and renaming of needles at various points in the pattern. I expect it works, but I couldn't be bothered with it.

Another thing which puzzled me briefly before I dismissed it was the rib pattern on the cuff, and I carried on with my usual k2, p2 for 16 rounds.

My additional cast on stitches resulted in 6 (knit) stitches either side of the central panel. Having been so used to knitting plain socks, I found adding a pattern a little slow going, but it's always lovely to see a pattern developing. As I'm short-legged, I decided to work one less pattern repeat down the leg, finishing on the row 11 to work the heel flap over half my stitches (36).

I enjoyed how fast the heel flap grew, and then I had to recalculate again to work out how many stitches to work when beginning to turn the heel. Here comes the maths - don't fret, it's only numbers!

The instructions call for sl 1, k17.
17 is half the heel stitches (32/2=16) plus one; with the slipped stitch at the start, this comes to 2 stitches past the half-way point of the heel.
So for my heel: (36/2=18+1=19) so sl 1; K19 (etc).
I didn't change the numbers of purl stitches on the wrong side row, although the resulting heel start is a bit pointy for my round heels.
Once all the heel stitches were worked, with an ssk (RS) or p2tog (WS) taking a stitch from each side of the gap created by turning the work to 'close the gap', there were 20 stitches remaining for me, instead of 18 as shown in the instructions.

One of the reasons that I like an all-in-one heel is that I'm not fond of picking up stitches and get bored with keeping track of gusset decreases. Luckily, I have a couple of sets of 2.75 mm dpns, which allows me to use extra when dealing with gussets, instead of redistributing stitches. Because I ended the pattern on a R11 before doing the heel flap, my pick-up-and-knit 20 sts down each heel flap was a pattern R12. I then did a round (pattern R1) to 'establish' the gussets, each on a separate needle in addition to the heel/sole and two instep needles, so a total of 5 needles for stitches.
I decreased 1 stitch each side of the gusset on even pattern rounds (starting R2); taking 2 pattern repeats to get back to 36 sole stitches.

I decreased back to 72 stitches, but I could have decreased by a couple more on each side of the instep. Finishing the foot and toe was straightforward, although I left the toe at 12 stitches top and bottom to kitchener stitch.

I could have finished the foot a few round early - I did 30 rounds after the design ended on the instep, assuming the toe would be 4.5 cm, but it's more like 5 cm with my tension gauge, only a tiny bit long in the foot. The decision to do one less pattern repeat on the leg turned out to be a good one - I would have had to cast on more stitches in the cuff to accommodate my bulky lower calf, and then decrease them away after one pattern repeat.

The photo shows the socks unblocked. They were perfectly comfortable, and are now in the washbasket!
I've still got a 'fiddly pattern' pair of socks on one set of needles, but am itching just to do a plain and straightforward pair again. In the meantime, I've picked up the alpaca jumper which has been left over summer while I tried to work out the instructions for the sleeves and how that applied to my arm length. That will be next, watch this space!

To Ink or Not to Ink ...

As in, Inktober ... that is the question.

Inktober is a concept created by artist Jake Parker, an invitation to accept the challenge of producing a piece of ink-based art, and posting it online, every day for the month of October. 31 days, 31 drawings.

I considered it this year, not because I am an artist, really, but because I keep saying I want to get into art and produce something good, and that needs doing rather than thinking about it. I set myself a challenge to produce 365 'creations' in a year (with less than 90 days to go, there is no way I can make this, but hey, no reason to give up!). And even if I only created doodles, it's all practice, and it develops an approach and style, a daily spot of drawing discipline. It would get me completely out of my comfort zone, as neither ink as a medium nor monochrome drawing are things I'm drawn to.

I set about finding paper; the pad I thought I had must have been my imagination, but I found a sketchbook which would do. Next, drawing pens, unused for at least 15 years, clean and hopefully ready to go. So far so good. Ink ... ink ... I was sure I had some bottles of ink. Eventually, I found it. Of course, I could just use biro/gel pen, Sharpie, any and all would count. I had a look at the prompts, (theme words). I can do this!

Can I though? I stopped doodling in the mid-80s, when it attracted adverse comments at work. I recently picked up a pencil again to sketch something and felt very uninspired and insecure, and critical of what I drew.

Do I really want to do this? There are so many other things I ought to be doing. Of course, I could set a daily time limit, but at the moment, I don't need the additional, self-imposed pressure. I'm already tired from knee pain, especially when it disturbs my sleep, and feeling the pressure of the things I'm not getting around to because of my need to rest, even if I would be sitting down to draw.

I agonised about it for a few days and then thought, if it's this hard to decide, the answer must be No.

I need to start drawing again first, to build a little confidence. To be effective, I just need to do a lot, consciously learning, but also letting go of perfectionism and attachment to outcomes, allowing it to just be.

Then, maybe next October.

September - Swallows, Sleeves, Socks, Strictly and Sleep

I can't believe we're nearly half-way through September already!

I haven't seen or heard any Swifts since perhaps mid-August. Small groups of Swallows dash eastwards, making the most of the wind behind them, calling and feeding as they go. A group today were particularly loud. I looked up just in time to see a Kestrel flying low through the gap between my house and next door, so low that it was its light-chestnut coloured back which identified it as a Kestrel. It was gone in a flash, so I couldn't catch whether it was male or female. I've only seen a Kestrel here once or twice, hunting along the fenceline, riding the wind.

The sun sets noticeably earlier and we've had night-time temperatures in single figures. I run hot, so am still in T shirts, but have had to put on something with sleeves on cooler evenings.

The cats have noticed the change in temperature and snuggle closer in bed, instead of sprawling, belly-up, in their own space. Now I'm under the duvet, instead of lying starfished on top of the sheets.

I keep seeing news predicting a week's heatwave in the wake of the Atlantic weather systems formed from the remnants of tropical storms Dorian and Gabrielle, though the weather for the week ahead locally doesn't reflect that. It may stay mild here, but once again, the media headlines refer to London and the south-east of England, as if that represents the whole of the UK.

It will soon be time to break out the woolly socks, and I have picked up some knitting which has been aestivating. I lose the motivation to knit during the summer, but it comes back as the weather cools.

My right knee is having a bit of a flare. A few weeks ago, it took the brunt of the twisting force as I tried to stop a wayward shopping trolley, which also ripped off the top of a finger nail. Despite lots of massage, physio exercises, mindful use, warmth and rest, it is getting worse rather than better. It's not just painful when I try to use it (and it's painful even when I'm resting it), but it feels as though the knee is on sideways. The familiar feeling that the insides are an overstretched, knotted ball of elastic, bits of which catch and ping. It won't bend properly with my weight on it, and is unreliable bearing my weight - a clue that the kneecap isn't tracking properly. Although it's occasionally been bad this year, it's not been this bad. It gave way last night as I was peeling some carrots, and I took a chunk of skin off one of my finger-tips with the peeler as I lost balance. Blood everywhere, and a throbbing finger to add to my irritability!

I'd forgotten how exhausting pain is. It wakes me at night, and though I fall asleep again quite easily (purring, snuggly cats help!), I sleep longer - eight hours becomes nine, ten, eleven ....

Another thing which provides some motivation is Strictly Come Dancing, which always makes me want to dance. Optimistically, I've rearranged a new course of belly dance classes starting in October, to give me a few weeks to try to get my knee a bit better again.

Perhaps if the weather heats up (ha ha!), some lying around on a warm, sunny beach and perhaps having a swim might be good therapy too! Meanwhile, I can sit with my leg up on the sofa, watching Strictly and knitting, which is pretty good therapy all by itself.

Sparks of joy

Deary me, my Create 365 challenge seemed so feasible at the start of the year, and here we are, last day of August without even a month's worth done.

Still, the idea was to motivate me to sort things out, one of which was a new pair of trainers which were comfortable the first time I wore them, and then, for some reason, increasingly uncomfortable. After the fourth time wearing them, I stopped and put them away.

I watched a documentary featuring Marie Kondo, and not for the first time, I wondered about the concept of 'sparking joy'. The answer seems to be straightforward, a binary yes/no.

Not generally one for getting satisfaction from tidying and decluttering, nevertheless when I went to put clean knickers away, I found myself folding them into neat little shapes, then took out some knickers that I only go to as a last resort. Why was that? Did they 'spark joy'? Actually, no. They've always been too uncomfortable, with thick elastic edges. A couple of sessions resulted in balls of  jersey yarn.

I also sorted a few pairs of old socks, a couple of sessions yielding 4 smaller balls of  jersey yarn again. Soon I'll have enough to make something!

I mended a T-shirt which had a couple of small tears in it, probably courtesy of my cat Greebo, who seems unable to jump up for a cuddle without creating holes in whatever I'm wearing.

But back to the trainers. I looked at them, all turquoise and pink and light, and was surprised to find a spark of joy. But they had been cheap, probably wouldn't last long and there was no point in keeping them if they were uncomfortable, so what to do? I slipped them on again to walk around and focus on the discomfort. Something was rubbing my heels, irritating my Achilles tendons. I slipped them off and looked at the backs - they were quite high and curved in a little, unlike my heels. The centre back seam ended in a hard knob, just in the wrong place.

I was unsure if I could fix this, but on the basis that you don't know until you try, I used a stitch ripper to undo the seam where the lining joined the outer across the back of the heel, cut both outer and lining straight across and trimmed the centre back seam, before adjusting the small foam heel pad and re-sewing lining to outer.

This worked, although they may still not last long now that they are wearable!

This batch of things: 6
Cumulative total: 28

It's a jungle out there!

The back garden, that is, although the front is no better, covered in weeds again. While I was concentrating on the front, and especially while I was a bit poorly in May and then again in June, the back garden rewilded itself into an almost impenetrable mass of brambles and pendulous sedge. The compost bins are full, I've hacked back brambles a few times and burned them in the incinerator, but everything is growing so fast! The Alchemilla mollis is about to sprawl everywhere too. I'm tempted to take it out. I've surely got enough of its seed in the soil that I shall never be without it.

The patio is also inaccessible, full of pots which blow about in the wind. I haven't done any moth trapping as setting up the trap feels just too complicated. And the privet hedges, overgrown and in full flower. The sparrows have been enjoying those, as well as the aphids on the roses.

Still, there are compensations. Apart from butterflies, and the occasional damselfly, this Common Darter caught my eye.